Beat Eating Disorder Awareness Week.

I have anorexiaThose are the hardest words to get out but it's the first step in the right direction. I first uttered those words to Michael around our 1st anniversary, after I realised that I wanted to have children with him (before I didn't want marriage or children). Now, I have had an eating disorder for 9 years and I am still struggling with it. Every. Single. Day. The difference is that for the last 3 1/2 years I have had Michael's full support, adoration and encouragement. Without him I wouldn't be writing this today. Opening up to someone, anyone, can make the world of difference, you might not get better but you know someone knows what's really going on when your silently calculating calories in your head. The thing is (and I know I'm lucky) Michael understands me, he knows when there's literally too much on my plate, or how I'm going to feel after someone has made an insensitive comment.
It's not okay for dogs so why is it okay for us? source.
I had a pretty awful childhood. This is where anorexia started for me, then it gradually grew until I managed to get myself M.E. I lost all control over my life and that's when my weight and health just plummeted, but nobody knew because I said it was just the M.E. So, when I'd had M.E for 2 years and an eating disorder for 6 1/2 I told my O.T who sent me to counselling for all of my problems where I had a terrible experience. When I turned 18 I was refered to an Anorexia clinic, but they'd never dealt with someone with an eating disorder that also had M.E and a lot of childhood issues. Eventually I couldn't make it to the clinic anymore and they discharged me, whilst there I had been eating more just to try to get it over and done with. When you have an eating disorder you will do crazy things. I still do crazy things, but I now have someone to hold my hand and give me a reason to live. Sometimes I just think of what anorexia nervosa can do to someone, not just outside but inside and that's what stops me from eating nothing. The fact that I don't have periods unless I'm on contraceptives scares the crap out of me. But, I am determined to be a mother and will survive this, hand in hand.

For support, advice, inspiration and information go to Beat.
If any of you who read this want to chat you can find my email in my about me page. I'll do my best to help :)


an M.E Post about an M.E Post.

written by Laura.
Considering i started this blog to help other people struggling with M.E i haven't really done many posts on it. But, this will change, so i'm taking tips from someone who already succeeds in sharing the hard side of M.E perfectly; Anna from M.E. myself and I. I always get her posts sent to my inbox so i read every single one of her posts whenever i can, i'm always in awe of her *tell it how it is* attitude and i think she's an excellent role model for a young girl suffering with M.E (i certainly know she would have helped me). There was one post recently that really got me, straight in the face. Her post on The Fear.
Here, read the first line:
'I imagine it's hard for a parent to hear their child say that they're feeling so poorly they worry they won't wake up tomorrow; that they feel so poorly they're scared that they might die in their sleep. There are no tears or hysterics when I say this to my parents. Just a matter-of-fact statement indicating just how poorly I really feel. The smile hides a lot you see.'

If you don't have M.E (i know a lot of our readers aren't, which we're pleased about) then please, please read this post! That's an order. Anna's post isn't just about fears, every single word is the truth. No one peaks under the hood of a car without a scratch or smoke, it's the same with M.E, because they can't find anything medical (Yet) we're immediately forgotten about and left to rust. Get my gist? M.E isn't just in our heads, i can honestly say that everyone i've ever known with M.E had pushed their bodies and minds to breaking point until it actually did break. So, when i read this post i cried and Michael held my hand because he gets it too. We're terrified of what comes next and what came first like so many other people out there with a serious illness (and yes it is serious). I don't remember what it feels like to be well. Yes, this makes me cry. But at least i don't know what i'm missing, i won't always be looking for the feeling of well and being dissapointed when it's not there. But, the fear is that i'll never know what 'well' feels like again. So, even if you haven't got M.E, take a look at Anna's blog and don't bugger off when i do more on this blog because it's important that you see and understand the best you can. Important for every single one of us.


2 Weeks Notice.

It's been a while since we posted regularly but Laura's less flu-y so we'll be throwing some good 'uns your way! But, for today, it's 2 Weeks Notice time to share with you all the things we've been loving.

  • Above is Este from Essie Button doing the closet confidential tag. This girl is awesome and if you don't already follow her, you should.
  • We found a blog dedicated to the perfect wardrobe and style. It's called Into Mind and it'll make you want to scrap that wardrobe and start all over again. No lie.
  • Belle from Petite Biet wrote this post on why children's books are so important and how a book helped her get through a messy childhood (Laura felt the same).
  • We lurve coconut anything so we definitely want to give making your own coconut butter a good go (when we get round to it you guys will be the first to know).
  • I discovered this new duo on Youtube last night and we like. The perfect ending to a Monday morning blog post.

Thank you for sticking by us when we can't pay much attention to our blogging baby. We've even managed to get new followers! *happy dance*


Bake of the week! 23/02/2014

If you're a regular reader then you'll know we love granola. However, we have never ventured into making our own recipe to share with you guys but here we are. Best. Granola. Ever. Do you want to know more? This one isn't packed full of different ingredients, it sticks to a few and blows them up. Cranberry and Almond, lovely.

Almond & Cranberry Granola

5 cups oats
2 cups chopped almonds
1/2 cup flaxseed 
3 cups cranberries
1/2 cup honey
1/2 cup brown sugar
3/4 cup coconut oil
3 tbsp butter/vegan if you want
1 tsp cinnamon

  • Line 2 baking trays with baking paper and set the oven to gas mark 4 / 350 Fahrenheit.
  • In a saucepan add the honey, brown sugar, coconut oil and butter, melt over a low heat until combined.
  • In a new bowl mix together the oats, chopped almonds (i chopped from whole) and flaxseed.
  • Add the melted ingredients to the bowl, along with the cinnamon, and stir together.
  • Spread the mixture across the 2 trays and pop in the oven.
  • Now, your preference; You can cook the granola for however long you like but you have to give it a move-about every 5/10 minutes. We cook ours for 30-40 minutes to get the perfect crunch with a little chewiness. Mmmmm.
  • Now for the cranberries, just stir them through the granola when cooled. Bobs your uncle...


Shake it like a polaroid picture (mark 2)

Unless you've been living under a rock you will know that it was Valentines day last Friday, which, for us, meant even more reason to be completely shut off from the world and be in our own little bubble. Perfect. So today's photo post will be of all things Valentines. And, if you're a 'stick your fingers down you throat' kinda person, look away now.

 pretty star in a heart necklace / a red rose every valentines / Laura's Nuts mag (an inside joke) / cute little lion

white choc & raspberry blondies / best popcorn ever / curries from our favourite indian

my half / Laura's half / i do love a good debate / snuggly rabbit hoodie


Bake of the week! 16/02/2014

Hmmm. Where to start? Lets just say this bake is not my finest, and definitely not my prettiest. But, Laura loved it so no harm done. Laura's feeling a little better from her flu so i could get a bit more stuck into the bake while she cuddled up and read her favourite blogs upstairs. Now, onto the bake; delicious White Chocolate and Raspberry Blondies.
We tried to veganise this but we don't think it went very well. I swapped the white chocolate to a vegan version and used no-egg instead of eggs and it just didn't happen. Truthfully, after an hour and a half in the oven it was still raw in the middle, no worries though we just got some good pieces from around the edges. Who wouldn't love gooey white chocolate cake with sweet bites of raspberry? Tip: Don't make it vegan. Alas, we're not giving up in the search for the perfect vegan blondie.


2 Weeks Notice.

Here comes another one! We've got another bunch of goodies from around the interwebs to share with you today.
  •  And i'd like to start it of with my song of the week (i find songs and then get them stuck in my head and won't stop singing them) from Billy Lockett. 
  •  Who wouldn't want this little guy? If we had a place of our own we'd snap him up.
  • We're really not a fan of Katie Hopkins (don't think many people are) and i don't think she's keen on making any friends here.
  • Joy the baker inspired us on her trip to Uganda - go have a look.
  • Laura loves posts on wardrobe staples like this, so if your into fashiony stuff too, you might need this in your life.
  • Everyone loves their four legged best friend, you need to read this post by Always with Yoo.
Share some of your favorites from around the interwebs with us in the commments!


Bake of the week! 09/02/2014

When it's cold, wet and windy there are a few bakes that can really warm you up and at least brighten up your belly, and a good crumble is definitely one of these. Today mine uses Gooseberries and Apple which is a favorite of ours since we had it on holiday a few years ago. And it sure does look yummy too...

The Gooseberries are quite tart so will need a good amount of sugar to balance is out, but they're flavour pops in your mouth. It's not a combination that most people will have heard of, but i urge you to find some Gooseberries because you need this in your life!

Goosberry and Apple Crumble

Topping -
150g flour
75g butter
60g brown sugar
60g oats
Cinnamon to taste

Filling -
200g gooseberries
200g sugar
4 peeled apples

  • Pre-heat oven to gas mark 5
  • Add the gooseberries and sugar to a saucepan and cook on a medium heat, stirring occasionally. 
  • Rub the flour and butter together to a breadcrumb consistency then add the brown sugar, oats and cinnamon.
  • Peel and chop apples into slices, then mix with the gooseberry sauce.
  • Pour into a baking dish and cover with the topping.
  • Cook for 30-40 mins or till the top is brown and crispy.
  • Enjoy!


Bake of the week! 02/02/2014

Laura's got flu so this will be short and sweet. We love easy recipes, simple and flavourful. Recipes that are versatile but still delicious on their own, and a good homemade roll is definitely one of these pleasures.

Wholemeal rolls (makes 6)

Ingredients :
2 cups strong wholemeal flour
1 1/4 strong white flour
2 tbsp sugar
1 1/2 tsp salt
1 tbsp almond milk
2 tbsp butter alternative melted
1 1/4 cups water
1 1/2 tsp fast action yeast

  • Mix together to form dough.
  • Flour surface, place dough and knead for 10 minutes.
  • Lightly grease a baking tray.
  •  Form dough into 6 balls then place on baking tray and leave to rise until doubled in size
  • Once doubled, bake for approximately 15-20 minutes on gas mark 4.