written by Laura.
Considering i started this blog to help other people struggling with M.E i haven't really done many posts on it. But, this will change, so i'm taking tips from someone who already succeeds in sharing the hard side of M.E perfectly; Anna from M.E. myself and I. I always get her posts sent to my inbox so i read every single one of her posts whenever i can, i'm always in awe of her *tell it how it is* attitude and i think she's an excellent role model for a young girl suffering with M.E (i certainly know she would have helped me). There was one post recently that really got me, straight in the face. Her post on The Fear.
Here, read the first line:
'I imagine it's hard for a parent to hear their child say that they're feeling so poorly they worry they won't wake up tomorrow; that they feel so poorly they're scared that they might die in their sleep.
There are no tears or hysterics when I say this to my parents. Just a
matter-of-fact statement indicating just how poorly I really feel. The
smile hides a lot you see.'
If you don't have M.E (i know a lot of our readers aren't, which we're pleased about) then please, please read this post! That's an order. Anna's post isn't just about fears, every single word is the truth. No one peaks under the hood of a car without a scratch or smoke, it's the same with M.E, because they can't find anything medical (Yet) we're immediately forgotten about and left to rust. Get my gist? M.E isn't just in our heads, i can honestly say that everyone i've ever known with M.E had pushed their bodies and minds to breaking point until it actually did break. So, when i read this post i cried and Michael held my hand because he gets it too. We're terrified of what comes next and what came first like so many other people out there with a serious illness (and yes it is serious). I don't remember what it feels like to be well. Yes, this makes me cry. But at least i don't know what i'm missing, i won't always be looking for the feeling of well and being dissapointed when it's not there. But, the fear is that i'll never know what 'well' feels like again. So, even if you haven't got M.E, take a look at Anna's blog and don't bugger off when i do more on this blog because it's important that you see and understand the best you can. Important for every single one of us.